I survived the first week. Today, every body part aches. I feel like I've been hit by a truck. But I am so relieved to know that I have the day off tomorrow and don't have to see all-business Brenda until Monday at 5 am. We are not allowed to weigh ourselves but once a month unless Brenda weighs us at the gym. Well, when I'm doing all the right things like eating right and working out like a maniac; I love to weigh myself. I like seeing the numbers go down although I can be a head case about it and I do know I can be slightly neurotic about it. Since, G-Pat knows this about me he took it upon himself to hide the scale. I can't find it anywhere. But today, I went to my neighbor's house and used hers. (I'm resourceful, ok?) Down 7 lbs in one week. Yes, I know it's all water weight but pounds lost is pounds lost, I always say - I don't care what form they come in. So see, I can weigh myself and not be neurotic. All that does for me is make me want to keep on fighting the fat.
I need a nap.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Biggest Loser - Thursday/Friday
I anticipated going to the gym all day. Thursdays are the day that I work out at night. So, thinking about it all day was torturous. I like being there in the morning, getting it over with and having the rest of the day trying to muster up what little energy I have to focus on all the things I need to get done. (which by the way, has not been happening lately)
She had us do 100 jumping jacks and after I really had to go to the bathroom. Well, all-business Brenda got a little ticked at me and said "we don't have time for bathroom breaks here. You should have taken care of that before you got here." I said, "I did take care of it beforehand but all that jumping makes jack have to pee." So, she says, "then you are just going to have to get you some adult diapers." This is what I mean when I say ALL-BUSINESS BRENDA.
On Friday morning, I was running on the treadmill and my new workout pants were way too big and kept falling down. I mean falling down so much that they were hanging down around my lower butt cheeks. So, I kept adjusting, trying to hold them up while I ran but nothing was working. I paused on my treadmill and tried to roll them up around the waist and Miss Brenda noticed and said, "what's wrong - are your pants falling down?" I said, "yes, I can't keep them up." Miss Brenda replies, "well that's nice but keep running and I don't care if you have to just run in your panties but you need to just keep moving." Ya'll might be thinking that I just took my pants off and ran in just my panties but no I could not because then I be the Firestarter again and that just won't work. But if I ever get to the day where my thighs don't rub together then I guarantee I would happily run in panties. But until then I just have to keep fighting the fat.
She had us do 100 jumping jacks and after I really had to go to the bathroom. Well, all-business Brenda got a little ticked at me and said "we don't have time for bathroom breaks here. You should have taken care of that before you got here." I said, "I did take care of it beforehand but all that jumping makes jack have to pee." So, she says, "then you are just going to have to get you some adult diapers." This is what I mean when I say ALL-BUSINESS BRENDA.
On Friday morning, I was running on the treadmill and my new workout pants were way too big and kept falling down. I mean falling down so much that they were hanging down around my lower butt cheeks. So, I kept adjusting, trying to hold them up while I ran but nothing was working. I paused on my treadmill and tried to roll them up around the waist and Miss Brenda noticed and said, "what's wrong - are your pants falling down?" I said, "yes, I can't keep them up." Miss Brenda replies, "well that's nice but keep running and I don't care if you have to just run in your panties but you need to just keep moving." Ya'll might be thinking that I just took my pants off and ran in just my panties but no I could not because then I be the Firestarter again and that just won't work. But if I ever get to the day where my thighs don't rub together then I guarantee I would happily run in panties. But until then I just have to keep fighting the fat.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Biggest loser - Tuesday & Wednesday
It was so nice not having to get up at the crack of dawn on Tuesday morning. This was my day to work out on my own. Since Greg is so concerned about me getting injured; he does not want me on the treadmill or doing anything on my feet. Which if you know Greg this is typical because he always wants me either on my back or my knees. (Just kidding- what? It was wide open.) But given my past history with injuries I figured he was right. So, I went to Big 5 and bought a water aerobics kit for $39.99. Now, I can just hop in the pool in the back yard and jog in the water all I want--all without touching the ground which makes G-Pat so happy. If I just had some blue hair, I'd fit right in with those ladies down at the community center. You know the kind. But I do have to say, Wednesday morning my arms were fealing a little sore from my water dumbells. (don't think I can't hear ya'll laughing at me)
Wednesday came all too soon and was back at the gym with Miss Brenda- I had told her about some of the recipes I've been using & she said she thought they sounded great and that I should bring in copies for RoseMarie (my competition) to help her out. Um, all-business-brenda say what? This is not a team effort - I'm not helping anyone out - she can find her own damn recipes just like I did. But I didn't say that, I said oh, sure -I will TRY to remember to do that. (emphasis on TRY) (NOT!)I'm fighting my own fat here not hers.
Wednesday came all too soon and was back at the gym with Miss Brenda- I had told her about some of the recipes I've been using & she said she thought they sounded great and that I should bring in copies for RoseMarie (my competition) to help her out. Um, all-business-brenda say what? This is not a team effort - I'm not helping anyone out - she can find her own damn recipes just like I did. But I didn't say that, I said oh, sure -I will TRY to remember to do that. (emphasis on TRY) (NOT!)I'm fighting my own fat here not hers.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Biggest Loser 7-26-10
The alarm clock rang at 4:50 am and I rolled out of bed to go meet all-business Brenda. I won't bore you with all the exercises I did but let me just say that my new black, biggest loser t-shirt (courtesy of Miss Brenda) was drenched. Seriously, I rang it out. Towards the end of my 2 hour workout this morning, all-business-Brenda said, "aren't you tired yet, Kelli? I said, "Are you kiddin'? Don't I look tired?" She replied, "actually, no you don't you look like you could go all day." I said, "that's just my bulldog on a bone determination." All I was thinking, was man, do I have her fooled. Then she had me do 800 crunches. Yes, that's right, I said 800. My abs are still on fire - 3 hours later. I hope I can get out of bed tomorrow. But today, I will fight my fat.
Biggest Loser - Saturday 7-24-10
I had to go meet with Brenda on Saturday morning for my official 1st workout and pictures that will be sent to the paper. She told me beforehand to wear black running shorts and black sports bra. Well, you may not know this but it is tough to find plus size running shorts. Most plus-size women do not run hence there is no need for these type of running shorts. But I found some online and paid extra shipping to make sure I had because I wanted to show her I was prepared. But when I received my package in the mail I received a 40 G bra instead of the black running shorts I ordered. A 40 G bra does not help me in this situation - I'm pretty sure I couldn't have fit my big ass cheeks into the cups of a 40 G bra. Not to mention how uncomfortable it would be with the snaps right at my hoo-hoo. So off to good 'ol Wal-mart I go to find something I can squeeze into. Well, they had some of these shorts there but they were a little too much like daisy dukes so I bought some slightly longer bike shorts to wear underneath. So when I got to the gym for my workout, Brenda says, "You're funny Kelli, why do have all that on?" I said, "Well you told me that we'd be working out today and I figured you were going to have me on the treadmill and I knew that if I didn't have on something underneath these daisy dukes there would be so much friction between my thighs that I'm liable to start a fire in here." This, my friends, is why I have to fight the fat.
The Biggest Loser
About a month ago my dear friend April was visiting over Father's Day weekend. I told her that I found an article in the paper for a local contest for the Biggest Loser and that I was going to try out. I downloaded the application, wrote my essay where I was trying to sound sweet but funny so I would get chosen. I wrote of my determination and how when I set my mind to something I'm like a "bulldog on a bone." For me, it's just how to get to that place of determination and staying there. Then, April took some God awful pictures of me in nothing but a sports bra and shorts. I'm pretty sure I vomited in my mouth when I saw these pictures as I'm sure April did too. But I mailed it all in and surprise, surprise but I got picked to be a contestant. I get 4 months of personal training and nutritional advice and I work out with Brenda (my trainer-picture Jillian on Biggest Loser but with blonde hair, bigger boobs but same type of rockin' body) 5 days a week for 2-3 hrs per day. The winner (whoever loses the most inches) wins 2 extra months of training for free. Did I mention that all of this is going to be in the local newspaper and possibly have to do some tv interviews. Yes, that's right these God forsaken pictures will be in the paper for everyone to see with my weight and all my inches. Trust me, I have alot of inches. But I don't know anyone here anyway and I don't think that when people do meet me they think..."Gosh, Kelli - really you weigh 235lbs? I am shocked I truly thought you must be a size 4." That I can tell you does NOT happen. So, for today I am going to keep on fighting my fat.
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