It's Complicated

The body is a complicated thing.  My body is especially complicated.  I don't like complicated.  I'm from Mississippi and I'm not even sure if my family tree forks.   That is why I appreciate simple things. 

There are so many things to learn while trying to fight the fat.  For example: I was running (said like Forrest Gump)  tonight at the gym.  It was an all cardio night.  Which means I hop on the treadmill and don't get off for at least an hour and a half.  (All-business Brenda said I could stop running after an hour and a half.)  I do run at different speeds and, therefore different intensities and I do take a twenty second break every few minutes.  But only twenty seconds.  That's it.  Let me just tell you...it's hard to catch your breath in twenty seconds or at least it is for this fatty.  But anyway, I checked my heart rate and was above the max level for my age.  So, I asked all-business Brenda, "what happens when my heart rate is above the max level?"  She said, "your body goes into anaerobic and you're not burning fat."  I think that's what she said.  It was something like that.  I was running my tookus off on the treadmill - I can't pay attention to everything.  But this is what I mean by bodies are complicated.  I'm running hard and fast and then find out that I wasn't even burning fat.  I had to slow down to bring my heart rate back down into the FAT BURNING ZONE.  See, complicated. 

Then, you have to eat some carbs because carbs give you energy but you can't have too many or the wrong kinds of carbs because they turn into sugar and sugar equals fat.  Oh, and if you don't eat, you're body thinks your going into starvation and hangs on to the fat for dear life.  Why can't my body just know that if I don't eat it's because I'm trying to lose weight and be anorexic?  Just kidding.  I don't really want to be anorexic.  I think.  So, what I'm wondering is...all that calories in versus calories out just a bunch of malarkey?  Why can't it just be simple?  I like simple.  Most of the time, I think I'm a pretty smart gal.  But when it comes to learning about all the intricacies of my body; I'm about as smart as a box of hair.

But for some exciting news...I was down a few more L-B's tonight so now I'm as giddy as a school girl on prom night. I'm going to bed now.  I'm delirious.  Plus, I have to be up at o'dark hundred for another beatin'.  Stay tuned...tomorrow I'm going to tell you a funny fatty story that happened to me a few years ago.

Still fightin' the fat...